Tuesday, October 5, 2010

Fear

I hold the hand of my greatest enemy yet I won't let go. I am afraid to because her name is fear.
Some opposites of fear are love, faith, confidence, smile, great accomplishments.
I am greatly impacted by the life of Greg Mortensen who wrote Three Cups of Tea and Stones into Schools. He has done great things for the least and lost because he has refused to let fear stop him. Instead he loves children and goes into the most dangerous places on the earth to help. He is my new hero.
I was laying in bed thinking about fear
Fear is the enemy of a good marriage. It keeps us asking the questions that hurt a marriage like, "Will I loose myself?" "Will she take advantage of me?" "Will I have to do more work than him?"
When I was afraid I did my worst parenting. Instead of being confident, hopeful, happy. The "what if's" killed me.
Fear keeps a gun under the pillow instead of a prayer in the heart.
Fear keeps me from forgiving my brother or sister or husband or friend.
Fear builds walls of division between people naming them democrats, republicans, liberals, conservatives, baptists, catholics, mormons...men, women, gay, lesbian...
Fear of rejection stops me from being my best true self.
Fear of failure keeps me from trying something new or using my gifts to bless the world.
Fear of loss makes me less generous.
Freedom from fear...imagine a world without it! without the need for it!
In the 70's many old people died in Kansas City because it was extremely hot and they were afraid to open their windows to let air in at night.
Do we need it?
Anger is always a secondary emotion. The first is often fear.
"Love is Letting Go of Fear". "Perfect love casts out fear"
Maybe instead of focusing on not fearing I should focus on loving, believing, hoping, trusting, faith...
Or the applause of God.
I'm afraid it's 5 and I won't make it through this day unless I go back to bed.