Weddings

I was just sending pictures to Keely of she and Bryan's wedding. It was a perfect wedding! Except for the parts that were not perfect like the cold and the wind. But that part drew us together, gathering in jackets over pretty dresses, huddling together around the fire, laughing, dancing. It was perfect!
It's almost our wedding anniversary - 38 years on the 15th of August. Ours was a perfect wedding too. Except for the parts that were not perfect and I'm finding it harder and harder to remember those. I walked down the isle hating walking down the isle with everyone staring at me. My hands were shaking so bad that Terry had a hard time putting my ring on. Terry thought he'd forgotten his pants and drove home to get them only to find out John had them on! We met before the wedding for prayer with Terry's Dad. Terry kissed me good morning while I was asleep on the bunk bed in the family room the day of the wedding. I listened intently to each word Terry's Dad (who married us) said. Very meaningful to me at the time. Madelyn Farley sang two songs. "O Perfect Love" was one of them. We walked out to, "With a Steadfast Faith together Let us walk." So many people came to the wedding. By the time the greeting line at the reception at the Cardwell Gym was through there was no grooms cake left. Red Velvet Cake especially for Terry. I remember the Ball family came from Billings and that meant so much. Mostly I remember being happy and peaceful because I still had that Spirit from attending reunion the week before with Terry. And I loved that my family and Terry's got along well and were loving to each other. I especially loved the relationship Terry's Mom and mine had. Terry's Mom made beautiful flowers with baby's breath she found growing wild near the ranch. Grandpa Carroll Sacry bought beautiful long white flowers for the front.
Dad had a cut on his head from bumping into something at work. Terry's Mom had a swollen lip from a cold sore she got. I had five on my lip. It was perfect.
We've had a perfect marriage. Except for the part that wasn't perfect. We probably got married for the wrong reasons. Sometimes we had to work awfully hard to make things right. Sometimes I could find alot more wrong about us than right. Sometimes I wondered if I'd made a mistake. I couldn't figure out how to work out the problems we have faced. But we did. And now it's perfect. Except for... Actually, now it is perfect. I love everything about Terry. And I love that we can be angry at each other and not hold resentment or ill will against each other. How we can love each other so deeply and still want to punch each other. I love our wrinkled, fatter faces. When I lay in bed watching him sleep I find myself adoring his snoring, whiskery face. When he looses his temper I ask myself what has hurt his feelings, not what I can say back to him. I love being quiet yet comfortable with him. I love that I can tell him what I'm feeling and he doesn't try to fix me. I love that he has become the perfect lover, and also my very best friend. I love that he leads me spiritually, but he doesn't criticize me when I don't want to go to church or I tell him some way out idea about God. I love that he defends me. He thinks I'm beautiful and tells me almost every day. (sometimes I look in the mirror and realize he's hopelessly in love with me and that's making him blind!)
I hope God gives me 38 more years of this life with him. But I think some of those years will probably be lived on the other side where it is going to be perfect...
Hmmmmmm. I wonder what perfect will mean there.